I first saw this at "A Master and His Slave", one of the best blogs you'll ever hope to find in blogdom. Not only do I think this set of "commandments" is terrific, the entire site that it's taken from can help all of us (even if it's aimed at those darn heterosexuals...LOL). You definitely should bookmark http://www.the-iron-gate.com/ if you're interested in learning more about our wonderful BDSM world.
10 Commandments for Newbies
Author: LadyMary03
I. THOU SHALT BE RELENTLESS IN YOUR SEARCH OF KNOWLEDGE ...for there are many who are willing and eager to guide and assist you in your search
II. THOU SHALT NOT BE HAUGHTY OF MIND ...for we all are still learning and growing. There is no shame in not knowing a right word or how to do something. Always keep an open and humble mind when it comes to learning.
III. THOU SHALT BE STEADFAST AND BOLD OF HEART ...for there are those who will try to humiliate you and belittle you for their egos sake. (example: "for a newbie-you sure have opinions" "newbies should be seen and not heard" "this isn't a beginners forum")
IV. THOU SHALT BE RESPECTFUL OF OTHERS ...for we should all respect each other as humans and as part of the same community. Even if opinions clash it is possible to disagree without being disagreeable keeping a sense of respect for one another.
V. THOU SHALT SEEK OUT THOSE OF LIKE KIND ...for there are chat rooms, munches, socials and parties readily available to give you an opportunity to make acquaintances. You are not alone.
VI. THOU SHALT NOT FEEL PRESSURED TO PERFORM FOR OTHERS SAKE ...for there are those who will mock where you are comfortable with. Perhaps you are only comfortable giving/taking mild spankings whereas an edge playing sadist/masochist may snub you feeling superior. They are not. The only right way to be is the right way for you!
VII. THOU SHALT NOT JUDGE LEST YE BE JUDGED ...for each relationship is special and unique between the people directly involved. As an observer you may not understand it but you don't have to as long as the people involved are in concensual agreement.
VIII. THOU SHALT BE KIND ONE TO ANOTHER ...for we are all part of the same community. Insults and Flaming weaken the whole. We are fortunate because we have 4 cheeks to turn thus we should be even more forgiving of each others faults.
IX. THOU SHALT BE ACCOUNTABLE FOR YOUR ACTIONS ...for with the availability of knowledge and the forums for opinions there is little reason to act in ignorance which may lead to unfortunate experiences. This means proper understanding of safe, sane and concensual play including negotiation and safewords and communicating your wants & needs efficiently. Do not assume others can read your every thought.
X. THOU SHALT BE TRUE TO YOURSELF ...for you are wonderful and unique in your individual way. There is no specific way a Dominant/Submissive must be. We are all distinctive jewels with our own remarkable personalities. There is no mold.
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